I was lost

Category: Apparel

As I got older, I realised how little I know about my grandparents. I have only seen them in old photo albums. I researched the stories of my ancestors, and with my collection, I tell a story of self-discovery. The knitting machine is a tool through which I can convey emotions that endure despite the fading of memories. With the help of an old knitting machine, I can give people's stories durability and new meaning. The knitting machine is capricious – sometimes it doesn't like a particular yarn, or it drops stitches altogether. Getting to know it takes time. Through this activity, I gain clarity on how the missing contact with my grandparents has shaped me into who I am as a woman and a designer. Although my grandparents did not live long enough for their skin to become wrinkled, I imagine what they might look like today. Using a technique called "smocking," I attempt to convey the effect of wrinkled skin. I incorporate this technique into various coats, creating textures that resemble the lines and folds of aged skin. This not only honors their memory but also brings a tactile, visual representation of the passage of time and the stories etched into one's being. Playful knits are inspired by those pictures that capture long-gone souls unexpectedly in the midst of a joyful moment. Tight-fitting garments around the body are like a touch that my soul experiences on lonely evenings. This is my personal story, which tells how over the years I have “patched” the void within me. Can it be called grief if I have never met these people? During the creation of the collection, I find acceptance and reconciliation with the situation. I have realized that no one’s place in this world is static or eternal. This is a narrative that unfolds with each knit, an exploration that continues to shape my identity. This collection is my solution that works even when words are not enough.